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Epistulae Ciceronis
A Perfectly Squiffy Jag

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01.02.09 Sunday
01:32 pm - Dogville
"There's an American TV show in which the president of the US is black. People say, 'Oh look, that's OK, there's a black president on TV.' That's completely humiliating because that's not how it is. There's no black president. Political correctness kills discussion." - Lars von Trier.


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15.01.09 Thursday
10:14 am - Self-Righteousness
Have I mentioned how much I adore Roger Ebert lately? "Art-directed in gloomy House of Tudor colors, "The Other Boleyn Girl" offers high-toned pulp for those who like to imagine themselves superior to ranch-colonial Desperate Housewives, and who don't like to feel so guilty about the pleasure they get from vicarious lust and treachery. Movies like this are designed to let the art-house crowd revel in marginally educative vulgarity without getting their sensibilities dirty."


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23.10.08 Thursday
10:37 am - He said it.
[info]uncelestial: i know i've taken out pumpkin guts.
[info]uncelestial: that's like getting to second base with a pumpkin
[info]uncelestial: i can't remember if i've gone all the way.

Tags:

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20.05.08 Tuesday
11:40 am - The Kennedys
Katie:  Did you hear about Senator Kennedy? He has a brain tumor. It's really sad.
Me:All of the Kennedys die in strange and unusual ways. Like skiing accidents.
Katie: That was Sonny Bono. You're thinking of an airplane crash.
Me:No, that was a different Kennedy. Anyway, I always assumed it was the CIA trying to finish the job.
Katie: Next it will be Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Me:That makes no sense at all.
Katie: He's married to a Kennedy.
Me:Yeah - but have you seen The Terminator. I mean, the CIA can't even take out Castro.



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13.10.07 Saturday
01:37 pm - What is black?
In all of the excitement and hype of Hispanic Awareness Year, our friends of darker skin colors have been largely neglected. In an effort to bring attention to the diversity of flavors that minorities come in, I'd like to address an important issue: what is black?

Recently, NSBE Magazine voted Microsoft the best place for black engineers to work. The cover of the magazine shows two (undoubtebly) black boxers with an audience of (allegedly) black corporate-types in the background. Now, as a black American* I find this wildly offensive.

Up front, this magazine promotes the stereotypical association of blacks as athletes, and particularly boxers, which detracts from other socially equalizing images such as the black politician, the black diplomat, or the black actor (yes, these jobs now all come in black).

Additionally, and more importantly, the group of (allegedly) black corporate-types are much lighter than the boxers - in some cases, so much so that it's only clear that they're black because of the context. This supports two other stereotypes that really get under my skin.

First, successful black people are light skinned. Everyone knows that. Look at Michael Jackson and Halle Berry. Clearly, the darker skinned people belong in the ring, where as the light skin people belong in the office.

Second, that One Drop of African blood makes you black. Essentially, white means 100% white; everything else is black. I'm roughly 10% Native American, but no one would identify my as a red skin. Admittedly, stereotypically black traits are often genetically dominant (e.g., black hair) but how is it that someone who is a majority non-African be considered black? (Let's disregard for a minute that blacks aren't exclusive to Africans).

To help illustrate this, I've developed a Scientifically Foolproof measure of Blackness, and applied it to the photos on this page. Note that the Authentic Black® (source) is 66% black. The boxers are around 50%. The corporate engineers? 40% - a full 20% less black than the Authentic Black®.

Kola Boof's extremely racially offensive and politically incorrect article "The PROOF: Authentic Blackness" pretty much sums up my opinion on the matter. She observes the trend, particularly in America, for beauty and success amongst blacks (particularly black women) to be associated with lighter and lighter skin. She argues that most African Americans are not Authentic Blacks and, in fact, that their actions and breeding patterns show a resentment of their African heritage. She argues that a shared heritage, cultural background or cause does not make you black - only blood. "We are not so worthless...that just anybody can be us." (I recommend reading the full article; it's full of memorable quotes such as referencing the BET as "white supremacist minstrel network.. (aka 'the mulatto follies')".

* OK, so I'm not a black American. In fact, according to my Scientifically Foolproof measure of blackness, I'm only 9%. I did make it all the way through a broadcast of the Tavis Smiley show once, though. Do you think it'd give me a chance with this hottie??

Current Friend-Of Count: 322.


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09.08.07 Thursday
11:33 am - Write my Epitath.
Various recent events have reminded me that, counter to popular belief, I may not be immortal. With that in mind, I'd like to be prepared with an epitath. What would you write on my tombstone? Anonymous comments enabled, of course.


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07.06.07 Thursday
07:10 pm - Those Crazy Mormons.
My dad loaned us Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer on audio CD, and Katie has been listening to it pretty much non-stop for the last few days. I haven't been listening too closely to it, but this particular clip caught my ear...

"During pretrial hearings, Ron's behavior in the courtroom served to underscore his lawyers' contention that he was mentally incompetent. He appeared with a cloth sign attached to the seat of his prison jumpsuit that read, EXIT ONLY; his attorneys explained that he wore the sign to ward off the Mormon angel Moroni, who Ron believed was an evil homosexual spirit trying to invade his body through his anus. He believed that this same sodomizing spirit had already taken possession of Judge Hansen's body, which is why Ron made a point of shouting profanities at the judge and addressing him with such epithets as 'Punky Brewster' and 'fucking punk.'"


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22.05.06 Monday
12:29 am - Online Prostitution Goes Public
To:JohnS@komotv.com
Date:May 22, 2006
Subject:Selling sex online


Thanks for your insightful investigation about selling sex online.

It really bothers me that Craigslist doesn’t take responsibility for the content other people post on their site. I’m sure Craig has gotten filthy rich off people selling prostitution via his free web service. And the audacity to expect the community to monitor his site for him!

Based on your article, you may be interested in covering a similar situation that has fallen underneath the legal radar for years. In my neighborhood (out in Bothell) there is a municipal park with a public bulletin board in it (nothing fancy like Craigslist, just an old fashioned cork board). Similar to Craigslist, though, it is unmonitored by the owners - my very own city government!

The other day I walked past it and saw a girl advertising "baby-sitting" services. Is she over eighteen? Do her parents know she’s doing this? Is she reporting her income to the IRS? More importantly, what else might she be selling? It appalls me that my tax dollars are going to support this type of negligence.

I expect depravity and the corruption of youth from the Internet. I mean, it’s the same forum that brought us pornography and MySpace. I expect government to hold itself to a higher level of public responsibility, though.

I’d love to see you cover this in a follow-up investigation.

Sincerely,
Jeremy Caney
A concerned citizen


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19.04.06 Wednesday
02:50 am - What's black and white and red all over?
I just added a movie called Sinful Nuns of St. Valentine to my Netflix queue. It's only received a two star rating, but with the following description I couldn't pass it up:
    Set during the Inquisition, this erotic horror flick tells the story of a depraved abbess and her young novices, who dive into the murky waters of mental illness and carnal lust. The sisters are exposed when a young lover tries to kidnap his bride from the convent and witnesses their outrageous behavior. If the young man doesn't save his love from the insanity before the Inquisitors arrive, everyone will be executed!
And speaking of lustful nuns... )

On that note, the best quote from Black Narcissus: Q - "What will the nuns eat?" A - "Sausages! They will eat sausages". Just in case you were curious.


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06.11.05 Sunday
04:43 am - David Lynch on Cats and Earth

Last year, I posted a quote by David Lynch from his interview on the Eraserhead DVD. Reading it, though, doesn't quite do it justice; you really need to hear it as he tells the story.

[Watch video excerpt]

The video clip is five minutes long (thank you to [info]sarevilo for grabbing it off the DVD). It's actually compiled from two parts of the interview with about twenty minutes in between; at some point he just starts talking about this damned cat again, which is really amusing. Katie did a great job editing it, though, so you won't get that full experience. If you're short on time, just advance the timeline bar to the last quarter of the video; that's the best part.

The interview is incredible and if you like David Lynch I highly recommend that you rent the DVD, even if you don't want to watch Eraserhead, just for the hour and a half of him talking about film school, the AFI, the making of Eraser Head, dead cats and whatever else pops in his mind. It's totally worth watching even if you didn't enjoy the movie (it's not my favorite of his by any means) or have never watched it.

Semi-related: ourmedia.org is a neat service by archive.org that provides free media hosting. Also, while iMovie and Windows Movie Maker are pretty handy, you can also download Avid Free DV which is a light version of Avid's digital video software and more feature rich than either Microsoft or Apple's offerings (very cool).


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01.11.05 Tuesday
01:08 am - Fairly Entertaining...
I just installed this widget for OS X that sends text messages to cell phones. As an optional feature, it allows you to cross-post messages to smspeeping.com, where you can find messages such as:

"19:56:10 I got mad cuz when marc told u to suck his dick, u just did it. and I asked u to suck my dick u told me no."


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26.10.05 Wednesday
09:55 pm - Virtual PC
I am installing WindowsXP on my PowerBook. I had to laugh when the installation screen said, "Your PC will be faster and more reliable than ever before". Mac users must get a kick out of that.

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27.08.05 Saturday
12:48 pm - Thanks to [info]jawllyholiday for this find...
"A sculpture made with the pickled head of a dead fetus attached to a seagull's body has fueled a furor in Switzerland about the boundaries of art." [Source].


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05.07.05 Tuesday
05:05 pm - Discuss.
Better to be tried by twelve than carried by six.


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04.06.05 Saturday
04:45 pm - Childhood
...the perceptual innocence of childhood, when the sensum was not immediately and automatically subordinated to the concept.

- Aldous Huxley, Doors of Perception

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04:40 pm - A society of island universes
We Live together, we act on, and react to one another; but always and in all circumstances we are by ourselves. The martyrs go hand in hand into the arena; they are crucified alone. Embraced, the lovers desperately try to fuse their insulated ecstasies into a single self-transcendence; in vain. By its very nature every embodied spirit is doomed to suffer and enjoy in solitude. Sensations, feelings, insights, fancies – all these are private and, except through symbols and at second hand, incommunicable. We can pool information about experiences, but never the experiences themselves. From family to nation, every human group is a society of island universes.

- Aldous Huxley, Doors of Perception.

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24.05.05 Tuesday
01:58 am - It's been said...
"Yeah, it's got Orlando Bloom in it - but he's not a faggot in this one."

[Overheard at a downtown theatre from a woman discussing City of Heaven].
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18.05.05 Wednesday
01:33 am - What other people say...
Woman, on a first date at Bleu Bistro: "Well now, you strike me as a 'sex with an alligator' type of guy".
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06.02.05 Sunday
11:57 am
"Hi, my name is Shinji"
"Oh? That's funny. My cat's name is Shinji"
"..."
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30.01.05 Sunday
07:00 pm - From my cultural anthropology text...
"It is common for outside forces and the internal cultural exchange they promote to increase social disorganization within a group and lead to conservative political and religious movements" (Conformity and Conflict, p161).

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14.10.04 Thursday
08:17 pm - A society of island universes...
"We live together, we act on, and react to, one another; but always and in all circumstances we are by ourselves. The martyrs go hand in hand into the arena; they are crucified alone. Embraced, the lovers desperately try to fuse their insulated ecstasies into a single self-transcendence; in vain. By its very nature every embodied spirit is doomed to suffer and enjoy in solitude. Sensations, feelings, insights, fancies--all these are private and, except through symbols and at second hand, incommunicable. We can pool information about experiences, but never the experiences themselves. From family to nation, every human group is a society of island universes."

- Aldous Huxley, Doors of Perception (thanks to [info]llarian for looking this up!)

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06.10.04 Wednesday
07:03 pm - "No Jesus, No Peace"
Proverb or threat?
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29.05.04 Saturday
11:16 pm - Why I want to make babies
"I used to think Seattle was a solar system, but now I know it's a country." - S.R., Age 8.

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29.01.04 Thursday
04:12 am - Living in a Rose Quartz

The zone was where you went either to play, to make love, or to commit suicide - Robert Doisneau

In neglecting to dream I resign myself to the present. I find myself in a fog, now wandering, sometimes rushing, indifferent to direction or purpose; unaware of consequence. I'm entranced by textures, feelings and the allure of the moment. By isolating myself from the contrast of time I find peace and contentment; the contrived balance of neutrality. In this space, control is irrelevent and the heart is unconstrained. Here, everything is beautiful.


Current Music: Tori Amos: Me and a Gun

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09.01.04 Friday
04:03 am - A Perfect Marriage of Cat and Earth

Tonight, [info]howlmouse came over and we watched two David Lynch movies that I hadn't yet seen, surprisingly: Eraserhead and Elephant Man ).

We also watched an interview with David Lynch on the Eraserhead DVD which basically consists of him telling completely random and absurdly detailed stories loosely related to the making of Eraserhead. I enjoyed this interview as much if not more than the movie itself. The way his mind works is so completely fascinating; as Lindsay observed, his films depict his thought process completely (with an emphasis on details and disregard for the overall theme or context).

Best line from the documentary:

    "And tar preserves things. And the cat has served many purposes, but I lowered this cat in there, and then about a year later, came back, and pulled the wire and the cat came out, impregnated with tar. And I lay the cat down on the ground and came back another year later and it was a perfect marriage of cat and earth"
On the way home I got another flat tire, my fourth in the last year.

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