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| 07.04.09 |
Tuesday |
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| 10:35 pm
- I want this poster.
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| 17.12.08 |
Wednesday |
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| 01:53 pm
- Home Alone 4, part 2.
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There's no food in the house, so I'm drinking beer.
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| 15.11.08 |
Saturday |
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| 02:08 pm
- John's Birthday Party
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[+230 | Slideshow]
uncelestial had a pretty epic birthday party at his new home last night. The best addition (which I'm totally going to gank for my next theme party) was a greenscreen photobooth with 20+ backgrounds. Of course, the 9/11 background was the most popular - you just can't go wrong with exploding planes.
I was in a quiet mood last night and took quite a few photos, although my camera managed to make the rounds so I'm looking forward to what debauchery found its way onto my memory card. Of course, I still haven't posted photos from my halloween party yet so we'll see if I ever get around to going through them.
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| 30.08.08 |
Saturday |
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I never go outside barefoot. But today was different. Today, Katie was replacing light bulbs! This was too exciting to pass up, so I rushed outside, down the stairs, across the driveway, around the car and sat next to wisteria vines for a front-row seat of the action.
"Watch out for the glass", warns Katie.
Looking back over the driveway, I realize I stepped right through a hundred or so shards of broken glass. As well as two nails. And a push pin. Apparently refugees from a box Katie recently tried moving from her car.
On the way back I took the old light bulbs and installed them in the branches of a tree.
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| 11.06.08 |
Wednesday |
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| 03:29 pm
- Industrial Design Ethics Committee
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| 20.05.08 |
Tuesday |
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| Katie: | Did you hear about Senator Kennedy? He has a brain tumor. It's really sad. |
| Me: | All of the Kennedys die in strange and unusual ways. Like skiing accidents. |
| Katie: | That was Sonny Bono. You're thinking of an airplane crash. |
| Me: | No, that was a different Kennedy. Anyway, I always assumed it was the CIA trying to finish the job. |
| Katie: | Next it will be Arnold Schwarzenegger. |
| Me: | That makes no sense at all. |
| Katie: | He's married to a Kennedy. |
| Me: | Yeah - but have you seen The Terminator. I mean, the CIA can't even take out Castro. |
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| 23.04.08 |
Wednesday |
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| 08:51 am
- Drink Till She's Cute
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I want to create a site that is basically like Hot or Not, but instead of rating people on some abstract numeric scale you'll simply indicate the number of beers it would take.
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| 11.11.07 |
Sunday |
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| 02:37 pm
- Dead Baby Jokes
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Stolen from uncelestial. I was mildly amused up until the third frame, at which point I honestly couldn't stop laughing.
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| 05.09.07 |
Wednesday |
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| 02:14 pm
- Pre-Order Brides
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MarryYourDaughter.com. Brilliant.
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| 09.08.07 |
Thursday |
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| 11:33 am
- Write my Epitath.
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Various recent events have reminded me that, counter to popular belief, I may not be immortal. With that in mind, I'd like to be prepared with an epitath. What would you write on my tombstone? Anonymous comments enabled, of course.
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| 18.06.07 |
Monday |
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| 01:32 pm
- Tagging this blog is a felony
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I actually took this photo a long time ago, but I think I forgot to post it. This sign found near goldfischegirl's house on an abandoned factory.
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| 07.06.07 |
Thursday |
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| 07:10 pm
- Those Crazy Mormons.
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My dad loaned us Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer on audio CD, and Katie has been listening to it pretty much non-stop for the last few days. I haven't been listening too closely to it, but this particular clip caught my ear...
"During pretrial hearings, Ron's behavior in the courtroom served to underscore his lawyers' contention that he was mentally incompetent. He appeared with a cloth sign attached to the seat of his prison jumpsuit that read, EXIT ONLY; his attorneys explained that he wore the sign to ward off the Mormon angel Moroni, who Ron believed was an evil homosexual spirit trying to invade his body through his anus. He believed that this same sodomizing spirit had already taken possession of Judge Hansen's body, which is why Ron made a point of shouting profanities at the judge and addressing him with such epithets as 'Punky Brewster' and 'fucking punk.'"
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| 23.02.07 |
Friday |
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| 11:12 am
- Global Warming
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It's the dead of winter and my garden is starting to come back to life. WTF?
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| 08.12.06 |
Friday |
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| 01:58 am
- Unsolved mysteries.
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When my garbage can ran away last week I was concerned that it would be the last time I saw it. After a week I had given up all hope. But then today it mysteriously reappeared, waiting faithfully at the end of the street for us to pick it up.
In the meanwhile, my two favorite pairs of socks have developed holes in the toes. This makes me sad.
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| 26.11.06 |
Sunday |
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I remember times where I've woken up to find love letters left up on my computer, waiting for me. Sweet tidbits that always made my morning. Then came Katie. Now, I wake up to shit like this. WHAT DOES IT EVEN MEAN?
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| 14.11.06 |
Tuesday |
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"Fox plans to broadcast an interview with O.J. Simpson in which the former football star discusses 'how he would have committed' the slayings of his ex-wife and her friend, for which he was acquitted, the network said."
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| 12.11.06 |
Sunday |
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| 03:01 pm
- Guess it's time to get a new text editor.
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[2006-11-02: REVISION 1324]
[REMOVED] TextMate no longer pays tribute to human sacrifices, rape, nor does it show a picture of the God of the deaths in your dock -- ticket 945BEB5D
Current Music: The Justified Ancients of Mu Mu
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| 31.10.06 |
Tuesday |
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We just had a kid knock on our door dressed as "spinach... with E. coli".
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| 27.08.06 |
Sunday |
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| 12:05 pm
- When nerds fly.
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audiguy sent me this first person account of a guy who accidentally dropped his iPod in the toilet on an airplane, causing the entire flight to be rerouted and searched. Oops.
This reminds me of something I saw a few years ago, before September 11th. There was a huge hold up at the metal detector; it ended up taking about thirty minutes to make it through. At the front there was a crowd of police, security officers and customs officials. This was before they had the onsite screening rooms, so you could see everything.
Anyway, the commotion was centered around this guy that was the total poster boy for nerd stereotypes. He was trying to bring on the plane a suitcase full of computer parts. Every nerd has a box of this stuff at home; old couplers, random cables, a few odd sticks of RAM, various boards, possibly a soldering iron - but to the untrained eye it could easily be mistaken for a bomb. I can't even imagine the rundown you'd get for something like that today.
Only somewhat related: When I was a kid, I used to love playing scavenger hunts and would organize one for every excuse I could find for a party. My favorite place to go for scavenger hunts was the airport. This is before they required a ticket to get into the terminals (remember that?). So I'd go to the airport ahead of time with my pockets full of random trinkets like magnets, hooks, tubes/fuses, etc and hide them all around the airport. Sometimes these scavenger hunts would be augmented with challenge/response phrases that I'd either give to random strangers who were on long layovers or to friends of my parents who agreed to help. And then twenty minutes later you'd have twenty or so kids let loose on the airport tearing the place apart looking for these trinkets and harassing passengers.
I guess I'll never be doing that again - ha.
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| 24.06.06 |
Saturday |
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Last night I dreamt that I was at a pool party and I came up with the idea of using the pool to mix a giant gin and tonic that people could swim in. In the dream it seemed entirely brilliant. When I woke up, though, I realized that it was not only prohibitively expensive but beyond that it was simply disgusting.
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| 08.06.06 |
Thursday |
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| 10:48 pm
- Coffee house chatter
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I'm at Trabant. Typical scene. Two older men. Turtle necks with tweed jackets. Arguing about religion. What Christ meant when he said "blah, blah, blah". What the problem with society is. Why Bush is like a Crusader. I assume they're professors. Or they're students who never graduated but never left; take your pick. Anyway, they're really quite passionate about it. It's pathetic. I hope that by the time I'm their age I have something better to talk about than religion. Like the weather.
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| 01.06.06 |
Thursday |
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| 06:06 pm
- Regional variances in cost of death
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So, apparently an Iraqi civilian's life is worth $2,500 USD but an American's dog's life is worth $56,400 USD.
This begs prompts the question: if you could buy one dead dog or twenty-two dead Iraqi civilians which would you choose?
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| 31.05.06 |
Wednesday |
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| 01:50 pm
- Survival of the fittest
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A colony of bees have made their home in my barbeque.
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| 20.04.06 |
Thursday |
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| 10:40 pm
- Notification of Obsolete Humor
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Dear Internet,
I am writing to inform you that the following elements of your cyber-culture humor are no longer deemed amusing (if, in fact, they ever were) and should be removed from subsequent communications effective immediately.- Sentences ending with "!!!111".
- Use of the word "teh" instead of "the".
- The terms Interweb or Intarweb*.
- Posts addressed to abstract entities, such as "Dear Internet"
- Posts or emails ending with "That is all."
- The phrase "BEST [noun] EVAR"
- Terms that stand for something you've never actually done, such as "ROFL"
- Memes whose results are arbitrary and meaningless (e.g., "You are the color yellow! You're the opposite of Purple!!").
In addition, the following terms have been deprecated and should be discontinued over the following six months: "ASL", "LOL", "O RLY", "pr0n" and "OMG". It is understood that these terms are much loved and thus very popular; please be assured, however, that they have officially been re-categorized as Internet cliches.
Your understanding is appreciated.
That is all.
*"Cyberspace" and "Information Superhighway", however, are alright because they're retro now.
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| 13.03.06 |
Monday |
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The BBC has posted a shocking article suggesting that boys would rather learn about destructive technologies (like explosives) while girls would rather study things like the human body and healthcare (unbelievable!). And in response, some are apparently calling for segregation of classes according to gender sex.
I essentially agree with every one of monoecious's points on this topic so instead of restating them I'm just going to plagiarize her response:first thought: this could be exactly what people looking for gender equality or gender neutrality would NOT want.
second thought: they should just offer two classes and let the students choose rather than assigning them by sex.
third thought: the cynic in me thinks that even if they let the students choose, the classes would still acquire an association with gender, like shop and home-ec used to be. sigh. Now, the article isn't clear on how this would be administered or who exactly is calling for this segregation, but even the suggestion of it baffles me.
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| 20.02.06 |
Monday |
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| 06:26 pm
- All sorts of fucked up.
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I was going to make Katie sign this but apparently even I have some level of compassion.
So, instead, I'm allowing her to first cross out three terms of her choice, excluding the word "not" (although I retain the right to a one-time veto).
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| 12.02.06 |
Sunday |
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Behind my house is a forest. And under that forest is a lot of underbrush. And by underbrush, really, I mean blackberry bushes because they are the dominant species in the environment. And, as anyone who knows anything about blackberry bushes already knows, they are not content with just living in the forest - they have also launched an offensive on my house; after ignoring their tresspass onto my property they have continued up the hill and are now assaulting my back deck. It's true. In addition, the blackberry bushes have apparently recruited rats in order to aid in their efforts. That's right: rats.
Neighbors have asked me to take a stand. Objective experts have confirmed that it is in my households best interest to fight off the thorny and furry offenders alike. I've even been given referrals to illegal migrant workers that can do the job for under a grand.
Nonetheless, everytime I consider the job, I think of Mrs. Brisby in The Secret of NIMH and I can't bring myself to do it. And, considering that one of my roommates used to work for N.I.M.H. it's entirely possible that I do, in fact, have a population of genetically modified test rats living in my back yard.
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| 27.01.06 |
Friday |
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| 01:47 pm
- Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't after you
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Abstract: Among a fringe community of paranoids, aluminum helmets serve as the protective measure of choice against invasive radio signals. We investigate the efficacy of three aluminum helmet designs on a sample group of four individuals. Using a $250,000 network analyser, we find that although on average all helmets attenuate invasive radio frequencies in either directions (either emanating from an outside source, or emanating from the cranium of the subject), certain frequencies are in fact greatly amplified.
These amplified frequencies coincide with radio bands reserved for government use according to the Federal Communication Commission (FCC).
Statistical evidence suggests the use of helmets may in fact enhance the government's invasive abilities. We speculate that the government may in fact have started the helmet craze for this reason.
[Source; from sarevilo]
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| 22.01.06 |
Sunday |
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| 03:54 pm
- Twentieth Century Castles
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It's too bad they don't have any of these for sale in the Seattle area, or my search for commercial real estate would be over ;-). (Link credited to thursdayrome).
[Buy a missile silo]
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| 17.01.06 |
Tuesday |
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| 03:51 pm
- I think it's time
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to revisit Lobster Stick to Magnet.
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